She said, "it's just a woman thing," 
and pulled out of the drive 
i said not to worry 
i'm and understanding guy 
i heard that when you love someone 
you gotta let them go 
she hollered, "when i find myself 
you'll be the first to know." 
ooo-hooo no news  
I've learned to do the laundry 
feed the cat and clean the house 
i promised to be patient 
while she worked her problems out 
when she packed her bags 
her destination was unclear 
but i sensed that her intentions 
were honest and sincere 
ooo-hooo no news  
(chorus) 
she could telephone, tell a friend 
tell a lie about where she's been 
send a pigeon, send a fax 
write it on a postal pack 
send a signal up in smoke 
tap it out in morse code 
i'd prefer a bad excuse 
  
To no news  
Her momma's been a little vauge 
as to her whereabouts 
her sister says, "i'm certain 
your romance is headed south." 
i don't have a single doubt 
that she's still in love 
my level of anxiety 
is just a product of 
ooo-hooo no news  
(repeat chorus)  
She missed her bus, missed her plane 
surely, this can be explained 
lost her car at the mall 
got lost in a bathroom stall 
joined a cult, joined the klan 
on the road with pearl jam 
buried with the grateful dead 
came back as a parrot head 
got derailed, got de-iced 
offered as a sacrafice 
fbi, cia, if they've seen her 
they ain't saying 
no news! still no news!