Hey modern days, here we come
but our feet are swollen and we got no place to stay 
but we hope it would still be okay 
'cos we brought champagne 
and we thought that there must be sleeping bags 
(in this very modern day) 
But we're all very proud to be here today 
the first of a thousand million modern days 
'cos it's a scam, it's a royal kind of wham-bam figure 
it's abrieved in the sense of being up-john and senseless 
it's a see-saw sickness, it's a snake-bite, low-chant jive 
on the century's crime 
Well, it's a scam, it's a royal kind of wham-bam figure 
it's abrieved in the sense of being up-john and senseless 
it's a see-saw sickness, it's a snake-bite, low-chant jive 
on the century's crime 
Hey modern days, we're taken a-back 
we're a flame and a-gog, aloof and inhaled 
with a don-don briefcase, oh, wait for our call 
and i therefore shall declare 
that the stores shall be locked no more 
(no more), no more, (no more) 
Why shall men suffer, why shall there be freaks? 
why am i still rehearsing a song when i oughta sleep? 
'cos it's a scam, it's a royal kind of wham-bam figure 
it's abrieved in the sense of being up-john and senseless 
it's a see-saw sickness, it's a snake-bite, low-chant jive 
on the century's crime 
Well, it's a scam, it's a royal kind of wham-bam figure 
it's abrieved in the sense of being up-john and senseless 
it's a see-saw sickness, it's a snake-bite, low-chant jive 
on the century's crime 
Oh, chin-batty dour face, why did you go there? 
sitting on a cold stone, waiting for the train home 
hoping it would carry me home 
hoping it would carry me home 
Well, it's a scam, it's a royal kind of wham-bam figure 
it's abrieved in the sense of being up-john and senseless 
it's a see-saw sickness, it's a snake-bite, low-chant jive 
on the century's crime 
It's a scam, it's a royal kind of wham-bam figure 
it's abrieved in the sense of being up-john and senseless 
it's a see-saw sickness, it's a snake-bite, low-chant jive 
on the century's crime 
... 
Chin-batty dour face, why did you go there? 
sitting on a cold stone, waiting for the train home 
hoping that the wind blows in the right direction 
hoping someone [?] offering protection 
Chin-batty dour face, why did you go there? 
sitting on a cold stone, waiting for the train home 
hoping that the wind blows in the right direction 
hoping someone [?] offering erection