Beyotch! 
Short dog's in the house  once again with this pimp shit 
Chorus: 
These are the tales  the freaky tales 
These are the tales that i tell so well 
For fifteen years i've been a real player 
So if you wanna have sex say hell yeah 
Verse 1: too $hort 
I met this girl in atlanta 
She let a nigga fuck but i still can't stand her 
The pussy wasn't good i said "what's up bitch? 
I'm tired of fuckin' can you suck dick?" 
She said "no", but she had another friend 
So i switched like a real pimp 
Laying on my back with my dick in her mouth 
I said "beyotch!! what you talkin' 'bout?" 
She mumbled something, i don't know what she said 
Smoking on a joint gettin some bomb-ass head 
Bitch said her name was theresa 
All on my dick like cheese on pizza 
In the a-t-l where the grass is greener 
I fucked nina, melina, sabrina and tina 
When i first moved out there, i met holly 
Five-foot one with a bad ass body 
Freaky little bitch she was a gemini 
She used to stand up and say "shoot it in my eye!" 
I met another girl went to spellman college 
Every day after school i aquired the knowledge 
I took her to my house so i could get some 
I fucked her real good and made the bitch cum 
She was hella limber, said her name was amber 
She wouldn't stop screaming, that's all i remember 
I had another freak, her name was wendy 
When i first met the bitch she said "please don't pimp me!" 
I did it anyway 
I'm coming straight from oakland, c-a 
Ain't no other way, like my girl shante 
She lives in atlanta, but she comes from the bay 
Let me hit that hometown pussy on the strimp 
Look out for a nigga, treat me like a pimp 
You know i can't forget about the strippers 
Cinderella with the glass slipper 
Top down in the benz ain't spendin' no ends 
Fat bag of indo, bring all your friends 
It's like lotto, you get a quick pick 
Bitches said they heard i had a big dick 
So i showed it to 'em, only took one second 
Dick rock hard, bitches gettin' nekked 
Chorus: 
These are the tales, the freaky tales 
These are the tales that i tell so well 
For fifteen years i've been a real player 
So if you wanna have sex say hell yeah 
Verse 2: too $hort 
I know another bitch, her name is terri 
I lied to the bitch "it's about time i get married" 
I couldn't see me pimpin' her 
So i fucked her next door neighbor, jennifer 
She had two roommates, cindy and amy 
Terri caught me creepin' and said "nigga don't play me!" 
But them hoes liked to freak 
I used to send 'em new niggas every other week 
I never would tell you all the hoes i fucked 
These are the tales, some of this shit i made up 
I change the name so i can rhyme and shit 
So if it's you, you know the time bitch! 
I spent the night with monique in between the sheets 
It was her, her girlfriend april and me 
I do it on the regular, two at a time 
Call it what you want i be a fool wit' mine 
Like them texas niggas, i never would change 
Like my niggas up in cleveland spit the good game 
These hoes recognize when i come in the door 
I ain't trickin bitch, so what you want me for? 
Like natalie, swearin' up and down i had to be the one 
Bitch lets have some fun 
I fucked her, you thought i didn't 
Short dog's in the house and i keep on pimpin' 
So then i fucked the twins, sharon and karen 
Went straight for the panties, but they wasn't wearin 'em 
Don't ask me who i fucked first, it ain't my fault 
In the end, i still got the same results 
Chorus: 
These are the tales, the freaky tales 
These are the tales that i tell so well 
For fifteen years i've been a real player 
So if you wanna have sex say hell yeah 
Verse 3: too $hort 
Hell yeah, i never would forget charlene 
We was layin real close like two sardines 
Talkin', laughin', kissin' and shit 
Next thing i know she started kissin' my dick 
You know the rest, before she left i paged mia 
I told her "i got a new freak over here" 
She rushed over, i left and when i came back 
Them hoes was lickin' cats 
They call me "short" when i'm pimpin', "dog" when i'm mackin' 
Gotta get the money, thats all thats happenin' 
She wants to be my love slave, i need some bug spray 
To keep these hoes away 
I never would tell you all the hoes i fucked 
These are the tales, some of this shit i made up 
I change the name so i can rhyme and shit 
So if it's you, you know the time bitch! 
These are the tales, the freaky tales 
These are the tales that i tell so well 
For fifteen years i've been a real player 
So if you wanna get fucked say hell yeah (hell yeah) 
Beyotch! 
And it don't stop 
Old school short dog 
Still spittin' it 
Still gettin' it 
Gettin' that money 
Eastside baby, oakland 
You ain't knowin? 
Beyotch!