"and now a cow at bat in the bottom of the 6th inning
 of a little league game getting hit by a pitch"
 
 [baseball sounds and cow bell ringing,ball is hit and hits cow]
 [cow:] moo
 
 "and now a cow who goes skydiving for the very first time, 
 and thinks his parachute isn't gonna open when it finnally does 40 feet from the ground"
 
 [plane sounds]
 [m1:] alright cow, don't even think about just jump and enjoy the ride down, 
 quit being a pansy and do it
 [cow:] moo
 [ripcord sounds]
 [cow:] moo,mrr
 [parachute opens]
 [cow:] moow
 [thud]
 
 "and now a cow who goes to the chicken hot drivethru 
 and then gets halfway home before realising they forgot his french fries"
 
 [cow opening paper bag]
 [cow:] moo,moo
 [car screeches, and turns back around]
 [cow:] mrr
 
 "and now a cow winning first prise in the bellyflop contest at spring break 
 and then realises he can't swim"
 
 [cow walking towards pool, big splash]
 [cow:] moo
 [crowd cheering]
 [cow:] mrr,mrr
 [underwater moo]
 
 "and now a club gets a dance at a classy strip club, 
 when a bouncer notices he doesn't have any shoes on"
 
 [f1:] ohh baby you like it when i dance with you
 [cow:] moo
 [f1:] uh uh uh, you can't touch that
 [cow:] moo
 [bouncer:] keep your hands off the girl
 [cow:] moo
 [bouncer:] hey cow, you got no shoes on you gotta leave
 [cow:] moo
 [m2:] hey watch it cow
 
 "and now a cow playing tennis against farmer stinky thumbs arbuckle 
 when the farmer makes an obvious bad call"
 
 [tennis ball being hit]
 [farmer:] that was out
 [cow:] moo
 [farmer:] don't tell me it wasn't cause i saw it and that was out
 [cow:] moo
 [farmer:] by at least 3 feet that's how far, come in look there is still a mark where it's out
 [cow:] moo
 [farmer:] don't tell that was from an old ball, that was this ball and this ball was out
 [cow:] mrr
 [farmer:] you cannot see from that angle
 [cow:] moo
 
 "and now a cow recieves a phone call who he thinks is 
 from a famous actor but he soon finds out it's just a practical joke"
 
 [phone rings, cow picks it up]
 [farmer:] hello may i speak to the cow
 [cow:] moo
 [farmer:] hi, i'm a famous actor
 [cow:] moo
 [farmer:] oh, thank you very much, 
 i was wondering if you would like to go to dinner with me
 [cow:] moo
 [farmer:] why don't i make reservations?
 [cow:] moo
 [farmer:] and why don't i tell you my real name? 
 farmer stinky thumbs arbuckle
 [cow:] mrr
 [farmer:] take that fatty
 [cow:] mrr
 [slams down phone]
 
 "and now a cow gets his revenge on farmer stinky thumbs arbuckle"
 
 [car sounds]
 [farmer:] pull over, pull the vehicle to the side of the road, i am warning you for the last time.
 [car hits farmer]
 [farmer:] oooh
 [cow:] mooooooooooooo